Road Kill Dry Run

A Pictoral Essay

or something like that

We decided to camp out at the Muscle Car Ranch so we could report to you. It was a beautiful Oklahoma night with a fair breeze. You can call it a breeze when it's September and the air is perfect. Of course, in January that breeze is plain ole miserable. But it was September and so our story begins.

We toted along 4 kids and a dog. The kids were like freed captives, in a wild free-for-all while we set up camp. There is a lot to explore at the ranch; old firetrucks, frogs in the pond, funny road signs, old campers and very unique bathrooms. It is a very cool place for a kid. I would recommend when you come to bring the family. But leave the dog.

Otto, the German Short-Haired Pointer, was excited too. So excited that he immediately set about to spray the tents with his specialness. A great spraying battle waged into the night between Otto and Puck, the owner's dog. They did an excellent job of making sure our tents were watered. Thanks boys.

Otto, King of the Spray

Laws of Camping 

There are  Universal Laws of Camping. I know you know them but I will recount some of them now for you.

Rule One 

Tents go up in the dark.

The sun will set at Equator speed no matter what longitude or latitude you are at thereby ensuring the continuation of this rule.

Rule Two

Hammers and any tools necessary to put up the tent will suddenly spontaneously combust into the atmosphere thereby forcing you to search in the dark for a comparable tool. This rule exists solely to remind men of their cavemen days. I'm pretty sure it is also part of a subliminal advertising campaign for Snap-On Tools. I haven't totally figured that one out yet, so I will have to get back to you on it.

We spent a little time looking around before starting to cook burgers. This is some of what we saw. 

You just don't see this anywhere! 

Art?

Rule Three

No matter the degree of effort spent packing for a camping trip, you will forget a critical element of meal preparation.

 Last time it was actual hamburger. This time it was lighter fluid and BEER. Yes, I said beer.

I escaped the madness of the kids and dogs and headed out to town (a whopping 2 miles away) to find our forgotten essentials. Our favorite local liquor store is Bombay Liquor. (I highly recommend you visit them when you come to town!) I cruised into the parking lot in a panic only to find they were closed. CLOSED! Closed, I say!

Bombay Liquor

I started texting folks (not while driving, that is what VR is for) to see if someone would bring us some beer. Most friends never responded. You know who you are. Props to runner friend Tommy for the offer!

This is a true friend. He offers beer in emergencies!

Back at the Ranch,  I was rewarded for my efforts with the job of cooking in the dark.  The Ranch has several grills right by the ponds. I cooked up the burgers and somewhere around 9:30 we ate.

They was good,  if I do say so myself!








Rule Four

A camping trip must involve a run-in with wild animals.

Now, I wasn't afraid of this rule. After all, we were in city limits. There are no bears in this part of Oklahoma and most of the wild animals we see are dead, dead, dead. What's to fret about?

The Ranch's most impressive inhabitant was lurking around. I don't know his name but dadgum, he's incredible. For 27 seconds, I debated giving up beef out of reverence for such a magnificent beast.

I wish that was all I had to tell you about wild animals.  About the time I entered a good sound sleep and started dreaming of 2:45 marathons, this horrific growling, brawling sound started. One layer was a high pitched-squeal while the bottom note was what I imagine to be a sound found in some layer of hell. The cacophony was disorientating. At first, I thought that Kara Goucher was growling at my back while we flew down the Commonwealth Avenue in Boston. About the time I realized it was Otto, the growling sounded collided in the air with little girl screams. I jumped out of the tent, tripping on the zipper, to hear my daughters (9 and 6) and son (8) screaming while Otto and Puck played Mighty Dog. Teeth were everywhere as the two dogs duked it out and crashed through the kid's tent, leaving a good sized tear in the wall of the tent.

Well, it only took a few minutes and a few kicks to calm the dogs and a few hugs to reassure the kids.  But the result was that I got to sleep the rest of the night in a verysmall two man tent with a man and a dog. 

Did I mention that the dog had gas? ugh.

Morning

Morning came too quickly and we were joined by Paul and Tommy for the dry run of the race route. Sadly, we had no coffee.

We toured the area with Paul mapping out possibilities for a fabulous cross country-race. (Stay tuned for more details on this one. It should be fantastic!) 






And then we ran. 

Up 12 hills and down. Some of us (not me) bounded those hills like they didn't exist. I just ran them. I ran some of them slow, some of them faster. But the beauty of the hill is that if you persevere through it, you get the reward of the downhill when your turn-over is amazing, the wind is in your hair, and every idea of running glory is possible. 

And that Ladies and Gentlemen, well, that's why we run.